Arse of the week 15

This arse crashed in to the rather large white truck in front of him on Al Khail road. That part of the road is generally quiet, especially at 7am, so how did he hit the truck? Another one for Dubai police to ponder over.

13 vehicle pile-up

Emirates Today: A 13 vehicle pile-up on the perfectly straight Al Khail Road delayed traffic for an hour yesterday morning. Carelessness on the part of drivers and speeding on the roads was the cause as usual.

Dubai Tunnel Accidents Video

If you think there are some bad drivers in Dubai, take a look at what is happening inside the Dubai Airport Tunnel.



Click here if you can't see the video above

Arse of the week 15

My friends Sarah and Gordon were in this taxi when the arse crashed into the car in front because the taxi driver wasn't paying attention, not really a shock.

Fortunately they're ok, unfortunately so is the taxi driver. Thats why you should always wear a seatbelt, even in the back seat.

300 Accidents due to wet roads

Emirates Today: One person was seriously injured and two had to be rushed to hospital with medium injuries after crashes in Dubai on Sunday.

The data was released by the Dubai Traffic Police as part of the on-going “You Decide” campaign, that aims to improve the driving standards in the city.

Most of the accidents were caused due to the wet road condition after the rain in the afternoon. Many drivers failed to slow down and did not maintain the safe distance with the vehicles ahead.

Initial reports suggested more than 300 minor accidents occurred and were reported to the operations room between 1pm and 7pm.

7days reports that there were 580 accidents throughout the day, nice driving Dubai.

Christmas is coming

I love the Christmas run up, this year I'll be in the UK for most of it. I've only got a few decorations in my house because I don't like all the tat. Might get myself a bigger tree though.

The UAE generally makes more of an effort than the UK which just goes to show how politically correct the UK has become. Last year Abu Dhabi and Dubai went all out, they had some of the biggest and best Christmas decorations I've seen.

Last time I went home Dubai airport looked like Santa's grotto while Heathrow airport had one shabby looking Christmas tree and a few decorations, I reckon £10 worth throughout the whole airport. The Emirates airlines transfer desk in Heathrow had more decorations than the rest of the airport, how sad.

Yes I know its too early to put decorations up but Ive seen 3 other houses where I live who've got them up so I can to.

Big spider

I'm not keen on spiders especially one this big. This bad boy was happily buried in the ground when a hornet dug him out stung him to death and took over his home. I don't like hornets either so sprayed bug spray on them both.

I don't know what type of spider it was, hope it wasn't dangerous.

[Update] Apparently its a cobweb weaver spider, one from the Theridiidae family, same as the Red Back and Black Widow, nice.

Clyde & Molly

Forgot to post this - Molly came round to visit and decided to hump Clyde, he was not amused..


Clydes male, Mollys female

Dubai's most dangerous roads

DUBAI’S Top six most dangerous roads 2006 (first nine months)

• Sheikh Zayed Road - 102 vehicle accidents, resulting in 21 deaths, eight serious injuries, 42 medium injuries and 85 slightly injured.
• Emirates Road - 88 accidents, resulting in 28 deaths and 167 injured.
• Dubai-Al Ain Road - 27 accidents resulting in six deaths and 57 injured.
• Sheikh Rashid Road - 20 accidents resulting in five deaths and 47 injured.
• Al Quoz Industrial Area - 22 accidents resulting in five deaths.
• Jumeirah Beach Road - 14 accidents resulting in three deaths and 17 injured.

Source: 7days (image Gulfnews)

These statistics are for major accidents, minor accidents are in the 10's of thousands per month. The list pretty much states all of the major roads roads in Dubai, your odds are better playing Russian roulette than driving here.

Arse of the week 14

Thats my space, get out...

Photo courtesy of Wael

The Devils 4x4

EmiratesToday: Proof that the Devil drives a Range Rover - he's got 666 as his number plate. He doesn't care that hes doing 130mph as he's dead anyway.

Why would anyone choose a 4x4 thats the colour of a vets forearm?

[Update] The same 4x4 is in the newspaper again, caught by the same camera except this time doing 238kph, thats 147mph.

Stoning sentence commuted

Gulfnews - Fujariah: A woman escaped a sentence of 'death by stoning' after her sentence for adultery was commuted by an appeal court to one-year imprisonment, 40 lashes and deportation.

N.A.M., a Bangladeshi, had been convicted by Fujairah's Sharia Court of committing adultery with the second defendant, M.N. who was also convicted of the same charges.

With the stoning, N.A.M. was initially also sentenced to two years in jail, a Dh1,000 fine and deportation.

Rain

It rained yesterday for the first time since, er..., April I think. It would seem that some people here have never seen the magic of cloud p!ss as they ran into the streets and got wet. It was fun to watch people drive in it, hazards on, loosing control on corners, great entertainment.

Nice driving

How do you do that on a straight road?

Plastic Surgery

Emirates Today: This guy has spent $100,000 on plastic surgery, the before and after photos clearly show it was well worth the money*



*May be a lie

That sinking feeling...

Emirates Today: A dredger sinks off the coast of the Umm Sequeim area of Jumeirah Beach on Friday evening.

Arse of the week 13

Spotted in Al Qusasis by Bernard. Guess the driver thought he/she was in a 4x4, what an arse.

Visetor

Visitor to this building site? You need to park in the Visetors car park -Photo courtesy of Bernard.

Diera City Centre

Here's a photo of a sign I saw in Diera City Centre, made me giggle but then I am easily amused. It says 'Sunglass Hut' but 'Sungl' is covered by the pillar from most angles.

Running red lights

As a means to stop people running red lights in Dubai, EmiratesToday is now printing the photos of vehicles caught, along with a close up of the number plate, lets see how long that lasts once they print a photo of someone 'important'.

Dubai to be among 'top 10 safe driving cities in 5 years'

Gulfnews: An aggressive safe driving campaign "You Decide" has been launched to position Dubai among the top 10 cities in the world for safe driving within the next five years.

The first phase of the campaign will run for 90 days. It will provide increased awareness of road rules through print, broadcast and electronic media, and identify safe drivers.

The only way to make Dubai the 'one of the top 10 cities in the world for safe driving' would be to ban vehicles and make everyone walk. Very few people here respect the road rules as they're not enforced and people with 'wasta' can get away with anything.

Arse of the week 13

This accident happened at Al Hamriya flyover on Friday at 12 noon. A female driver couldn't control her speed through a turn and ended up hanging between the bridges after crashing through the barriers. Luckily she survived with only minor injuries and the embarrassment of being 'Arse of the week'.

Simply Ballroom

Went to the Theater in The Mall of the Emirates to see Simply Ballroom. It seemed like a good idea for some reason when it was explained to me but at the interval I made a quick dash to the bar where I stayed until it was over (think I upset a few people as a result) Ballroom dancing is not my cup of tea, but the show was apparently very good. I got tired just watching them dance. On the plus side met Lionel Blair after the show in Après and bought him a drink just so I could say "I bought that Lionel Blair bloke a drink'

Safety First

The photo's from Emirates Today highlighting the dangerous tasks some maids are asked to do. "Get out on that ledge and clean the windows woman."

I cant even get my maid to iron half the time, think I'll take a crash course in 'How to treat your maid right' maybe then she'll do some work.

Cool Blue Water

Tastes like p!ss buy Evian instead, even though it is 'greasy'*.






*Comment by Rachael many years ago.

Accident 'every two minutes'

7days: The number of minor accidents on Dubai’s roads between July and September this year rose by 8,000 compared to the same period last year, police announced yesterday. There were 62,342 minor accidents this year compared with 54,272 accidents in 2005, according to Brigadier Mohammad Al-Zafeen, head of Dubai traffic police. He said an accident happened every two minutes this year, while last year an accident happened in the emirate every three minutes.

I'm actually surprised I thought it would be more. I've had 4 idiots crash in to me in the last few years.

Clarence the taxi driver

The driver of my Taxi yesterday couldn't see more than about 10m in front of him, he would randomly hit the brakes for no reason and by the time he saw a speed bump it was too late to brake.

When we arrived at the Madinat he knocked over the barriers as he didn't see them then got out of the car looked at the damage and said "Ok, nothing, no problems" ... er except for the big dent and the 50cm black mark down the side of the car. Buy some glasses you arse.

Arse of the week 12

This guy crashed into the side of my hire car on a roundabout. He didn't stop at the give way sign because 'The sun was in his eyes' fortunately there wasn't much damage and it's a hire car.

Due to the archaic system for reporting accidents in the UAE I had to stop the car at the scene of the accident and call 999. It took a good 5 minutes before they answered the phone then a further 15 minutes to find someone who could speak English. I offered to drive to the nearby Police station to file a report but was told to wait where I was.... 9 more phone calls and 3 hours 7 minutes later the Police turned up, glad it wasn't serious.

Mall Entrance

This sign in Mall of the Emirates points to one of the entrances, via a small climb over an 8 foot high fence, perfect for the disabled shopper.

Satellite dishes

I think the people in the building opposite to Sarah's like their TV

Stairecase

Good use of jinglish on the door to the staircase in my office, noticed it ages ago but couldn't be bothered to blog it until now.

Please Keep close.

This is the sign on the door from the car park to the lifts in my office building. Keep close to what?

JP's room [update]

Getting there... at least the maid was brave enough to venture in this week and change the bedding.

Cakes!

Ross came round and made JP and me cakes and sandwiches, yay !